"Peace I leave with you; My [perfect] peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid. [Let My perfect peace calm you in every circumstance and give you courage and strength for every challenge.]
- John 14:27 [AMP]
"I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid."
- John 14:27 [NIV]
I recently took some time off work because I desperately needed a break. I found myself becoming very overwhelmed, irritated and exhausted. On my first day off, I was walking around my home and telling God how tired I was of being tired. It just felt like I always had something to do, if I didn't have to work, then I'd have to cook, if I didn't have cook, it would be laundry, if it wasn't that, then there would definitely be something to clean, and on the off chance there wasn't...I still had Cairo to raise. On top of all of those responsibilities, there's still me. Sometimes I can just about find enough time to bathe, brush my teeth and look presentable, let alone find the time to pray and read the word, or be a good girlfriend, a good sister, a good daughter or even manage this platform.
It sounds extreme, but that's how life can be at times. Sometimes, I feel like its smooth sailing, then other times before I know it, it feels like I'm drowning again.
Have you ever felt that way?
As I told God my frustrations, quietly, He whispered, whats your faith in?
I was like its in You, duh, hence why I'm praying right now [eye-roll]. But then I cast my mind back to the previous weeks and I remembered that I started downloading 'to-do list' apps on my phone, I started making self-care more of a priority, I started doing all the things the world said I should do in order to cope with feeling anxious and overwhelmed, and do you know what I forgot? I forgot to ask for grace. I forgot to wait on the Lord and renew my strength and weeks later I was feeling it.
All the face-masks, all the endless hours of binge-watching movies, all the uber-eats, all the insta-scrollin', all the self-care stuff was alright, but it could never sustain me, and it most definitely wouldn't transform me.
Only God could do that!
But because I almost believed it could...because I used them as my 'escape', my attempts to seek God became half-hearted because my dependence had shifted to how replenished some self-care would make me; not knowing that my body could feel brand new but it would always be at a loss, and it would always be temporary if my spirit remained weary. See, sis, sometimes when we follow the worlds prescriptions for our pain, whilst it does an amazing job of pleasuring our bodies and numbing our minds, we will always be thirsty and our spirits will always feel dead if it remains disconnected to the God who revives.
Just my thoughts! And a gentle reminder to prioritise the only One who can really renew your mind, spirit, body and soul.
- Millicent x